Our story this week comes from Jaci. Jaci shares about her breastfeeding story that started during the height of the pandemic and how she learned so much from her experience that helped her prepare her for breastfeeding her second child.
My breastfeeding journey is not at all what I would have expected it to be. With my first son, I knew I wanted to breastfeed but I was not prepared for how hard and at times stressful it can be. From the beginning I worried things were not going to be successful. I was not allowed to do skin to skin and he and I were separated for 12 hours. My son was born in April 2020 when the world was still new to COVID. I was induced after hours of being in labor and pushing, I had a fever at one point and they immediately treated me as if I had COVID. I was not allowed to hold my son until I had a negative COVID test. I was hit with so many overwhelming thoughts and feelings but one fear was “is this time away from my son going to ruin my chances at breastfeeding?”
While my son and I were separated, I had a pump in my room and I was able to produce a little colostrum to send with the nurses. Making an already traumatizing experience even worse, I had a few nurses who made me feel like I was failing at being able to properly provide for my son. Once we were finally reunited, I had a brief visit from the lactation consultant who made me feel inadequate. Not to mention, I felt things were very rushed and I left the hospital feeling like I still had no idea what I was doing. Because of the pandemic it was hard to find any additional support.
For the first few weeks of becoming a mom and battling postpartum depression, I was figuring out how to breastfeed. I dealt with incorrect latches, supply issues and the feeling that I should just give up. However, I stuck with it and I was able to successfully breastfeed for 18 months, surpassing any time frame I had originally imagined. When it came time to wean I wasn’t mentally or physically prepared for just how hard it would be. To my surprise my son handled it well, it was me who shed the tears.
The bond I was able to have with my son because of our breastfeeding journey is incredibly special. All thanks to the cluster feedings, long nights, sick days, times of comfort and so much more. It came as quite the surprise when just a month after I stopped nursing I found out I was pregnant. Here I am now almost 3 months into another breastfeeding journey. This time, one that started from the moment my son was born.
With my experience and knowledge from before, I’m feeling more confident today and thankfully we’re off to a good start. It’s true each baby is different but the bond and extra love that builds from breastfeeding is the same. This time, I also feel extra grateful to be in a position where I can work from home and keep my baby home with me. I can tell you now, I don’t miss having to pump in a bathroom or random storage space with no lock.
I hope to make it to a year this final time and I know when it’s time to stop it will be even harder than the last. I know how lucky I am to be able to provide for my boys and I don’t take a single day for granted.
What do you think about Jaci’s story? We think she did amazing! Thanks for sharing Jaci!
Would you like to share your breastfeeding story on our blog?