Caring for others is something us moms are usually pretty good at. It’s kind of an important part of being a mom - taking care of all the little humans. It’s a job that is so rewarding, but also, often very exhausting. With three kids of my own, I rarely get the opportunity to sleep until I am fully rested or prepare a meal that doesn’t revolve around the ever changing tastes of my children. Even as my boys get older and are able to help more with chores and responsibilities around the house, I am constantly coming along behind them making sure everything is taken care of and actually clean. From cleaning to cooking, from soccer practice to swim lessons, my job as a mom is never-ending! I too often find myself at the end of the day on edge and snappy at my husband and kids because I’m just so tired and worn out!
I used to think I was alone in this or that there was something wrong with me, but after speaking with so many other moms, I realize, I’m not the only mom who struggles with this! Motherhood is hard and exhausting! In some ways, it gets easier as your kids get older, but in other ways, it doesn’t as each new stage brings a new set of challenges and obstacles. I have learned the term “self-care” and while I used to think it was silly and selfish, I now see the importance of it! But how does a busy mom find time for herself and what does that even look like? In my experience, the best time for mom care (as we will continue to refer to it here) is usually naptime or right after the kids finally go to bed. I know you probably have a laundry list of things to do during that time (including the pile of laundry that continuously grows) but pick a day to let the “to-do list” sit and take a break!
Here are some ideas to help you incorporate some mom-care into your busy life:
Give yourself an at-home spa night
While pedicures are one of my favorite things, I don’t have the time or money to go out regularly and get them. While it isn’t the same thing, filling up a large bowl and letting my feet soak then painting my toenails is very relaxing. I’m not huge on painting my fingernails, but if that’s your thing - do that too! It’s a great way to force you to slow down (something us moms don’t do enough) as your nails dry and take a minute to just breathe. Maybe even throw in a fun face mask (I like this Dead Sea Mud Mask) or hair treatment! Do all the things! You deserve it!
Have a dance party for one
Whether you have the music blaring or keep it on the softer side so your kids can sleep, turn on some tunes and let loose! You can dance while folding the pile of laundry, scrubbing the tub, or just dance and leave the chores behind! Let your mind relax and move your body - you’ll feel better! You can even get your partner involved and make it a dance party for two!
Drink a cup of coffee or tea while you read
I’m awful at this one, but every now and then I find time to pick up one of the many books sitting on my nightstand and read a chapter while drinking some coffee, tea, or Calm (a new favorite of mine!).
Go for a walk/bike ride
If you have a baby or small kids too young to leave alone, strap them in the stroller or toddler bike seat and go for a stroll. Just getting out of the house and putting yourself in a new environment is enough to destress you, but add the endorphins from a little light exercise and you’ll be feeling great in no time!
Meet a friend for coffee
Going out to a local coffee shop certainly takes some planning because you can’t just leave your child(ren) at home while sleeping, but we NEED friends (and specifically other moms) in our life! Make it a priority to meet a friend once a month - or even every other month. Don’t have a sitter? Invite her and her kids over for coffee/tea at your house! Serve the baked goods you made the day prior! It doesn’t have to be fancy, it just has to happen. (See our blog on Building Your Tribe for more ideas on how to make mom friends and build your tribe!)
Buy yourself some flowers
Yes! You can buy yourself flowers! Take a little longer strolling through the fresh flower section at your grocery store or farmers market. Stop and smell the roses (or whatever flowers are on display) and bring some home! They will brighten your day and add a little color to your home.
Reorganize a cluttered drawer or closet
I am not the best housekeeper and I am TERRIBLE at doing a quick clean/tidy before guests arrive, but I am very gifted at micro organizing and have found that taking an hour to declutter and reorganize a “junk drawer” (that’s what we call it in the south!) or “catch-all closet” not only helps me to be less stressed later when I’m searching for something, but can improve my mood now and help me feel productive and accomplished!
Bake something
Whether it’s cookies, a cake, or brownies - get in the kitchen and just have fun! You can use a box mix or find a fun baking blog (I like Sally’s Baking Addiction! She has SO MANY great recipes!). Baking because you have to can be stressful, but baking because you want to can be a lot of fun! This can also be fun to do with the kids if they’re old enough and you can make some great and lasting memories!
Write in a journal
Take some time to write your thoughts in a journal. I’m not a huge journaling person, but I do find that when my thoughts are running 90-to-nothing in my head or I’m just feeling overwhelmed by all the weight and responsibilities I carry, just putting my thoughts on paper can help me breathe a little easier and feel a little lighter. Write about your day, write about your dreams and goals, or just write what’s weighing you down - it doesn’t have to be anything specific.
This journal is really pretty and designed with self care in mind!
Explore a new hobby
Have you been wanting to take up painting, yoga, baking, gardening…? Why not get started now? There are a million excuses we make when it comes to this type of thing, but you are worth investing in yourself! Try to find a local class you can do for a few weeks or find a blog/YouTube channel that will teach you the ins and outs of that hobby and dive in! What are you waiting for? (You know you’ve always wanted to learn how to knit!) Not sure what to do? Check out this mama’s blog - 100+ Hobbies for Moms (from Mama Goes Beyond)
Some other super simple way to care for yourself and boost your mood are:
Drink plenty of water (I know - it’s not as easy as it sounds!)
Take the time to find skincare products you love (and actually spend the money on good products - I recently found this brand that I really enjoy.)
Fill the pantry with healthy snacks so you have those on hand for a quick snack (almonds, apples, oranges, kind bars - keep it simple and easy!)
Make exercise a regular part of your routine
Cut back on social media
Take a bath with some relaxing bath salts
Watch your favorite movie (currently Mom’s Night Out is my go-to for a funny, upbeat, encouraging movie!)
Listen to a Podcast
Read a Book (you can find some of our favorite reads HERE!)
These are just some ideas of how you might take a moment to care for yourself. Hopefully these will inspire you and maybe even spark new ideas for things you love that you can begin to incorporate into your daily or weekly routine. I am so thankful my husband sees the need for me to “decompress” regularly and does his best to help facilitate that. However, he has a very busy schedule and it just isn’t always possible for him to take the kids for this, which is why the best chance I have at some good mom-care is either nap time, at night after the kids are in bed, or taking a day (or week) to throw the schedule out the window and just roll with it! In fact, this past month has been so busy that I decided last minute on Monday to not worry about school or too much housework, but instead, just do the fun things and let my brain (and my kids' brains - they need that decompression too!) take a break.
So if you’re struggling with feeling overwhelmed, find yourself cranky and irritable at your partner and/or kids, or you’re just having trouble thinking clearly - know that you’re not alone. TAKE A BREAK and practice some mom-care! Not only do you deserve it, but you NEED it!
Terri - General Manager at Milk + Honey Jewelry
Click here to check out some of our team's’ favorite self care items!
What are some ways you practice self-care? Do you find it’s easier to do if you get out of the house or does sneaking some mom-care in while the kids are sleeping work best for you? Comment below and share your thoughts with us! We’d love to hear from you!