It’s been a full morning and you know your toddler is exhausted! You make up a quick lunch and think of all the daily tasks that have been put off today because of your playdate. “No worries! She’ll go down pretty quick and sleep long - after all, she ran all morning, she’s so tired!” You take her upstairs, get her all snuggled in, read her a book, and head out the door. NAP TIME! Those few hours in the day that you get ALL TO YOURSELF!!! The peace, the quiet, the amazing feeling of not being needed! You have a laundry list of chores but also want to take a few moments to drink some coffee and maybe read something while you have a moment uninterrupted.
As you make your way down the stairs, you hear it - the sound of the door creaking open. You see her sweet little face peering out from the crack…and you know…the battle has begun.
I’ve met a few moms who claim they haven’t had this struggle (I actually think they’re lying and just don’t want to admit it), but most of us know exactly what it’s like to fight a toddler to take a nap. We know they need it, and we know we need that time where they’re safe and out of our hair! Sometimes they go down wonderfully without a struggle, other times, it’s a fight that ends in tears…and they still don’t get a nap! I believe every mother on the planet has faced this reality at some point (even if they say they haven’t).
So how do you get your toddler to nap?! Take it from a mom who's been there -
YOU DON’T!
Some of the best advice I’ve actually received was that if my toddler just won’t nap, then don’t make them! It honestly isn’t worth a daily fight and spending an hour or more trying to get them to sleep, especially when I have a thousand other things to do! This is where I have begun to incorporate “quiet time” with my kids and it’s a real game changer!
Here are some tips for when a nap just isn’t happening and how you can quickly incorporate “quiet time” smoothly so you can still tackle your “to-do” list and maybe even still get that coffee break.
Use A Visual Timer
I have found a visual timer to be very helpful and I love this star projector night light! It’s an easy way for them to see when quiet time is over. My daughter knows that she has to stay in her room until the purple light turns off, so it eliminates her coming and asking over and over “is quiet time over yet?”
Give Them Parameters For Activities
Sometimes I allow her to have her tablet for quiet time (depending on how tired she is or how much screen time she’s had that day already), and other times, she will just play with her toys or read her books. Either way, I give her very clear parameters on what she can do during her “quiet time”, making sure I remove loud toys from the room or put them on a high shelf in the closet.
Use A Video Monitor
Having a video monitor available to keep an eye on them is also helpful! It may give you a bit more peace of mind about leaving them in their room “unattended” if you can still keep an eye on them. This is something you may have already invested in when they were smaller, but as they get older, these monitors are still super useful!
Keep Their Bed Clear
Every now and then, I know my kids are super tired but they’re just too excited to go to sleep. However, if I leave them alone for a bit of “quiet time”, they will sometimes put themselves to bed on their own after a bit. I have taught my kids to play on the floor and keep their beds clear of toys and clutter (not that they always follow that!) and have found my kids many times curled up in bed after “quiet time” is over, sleeping peacefully! Sometimes they have their tablet in there with them, or sometimes it may be their Lego Duplo, but either way, I’m just glad to see them asleep! Keeping their beds clear of extra toys and having the blankets easy for them to crawl into helps.
While a quiet time doesn’t give your toddler the sleep they need, it does allow you some time to get your chores and activities completed without a little person clinging to your leg! Keep in mind that if they don’t get that nap, they will likely need to go to bed earlier that evening. (The good news is that bedtime should be less of a fight!!!)
Sometimes quiet time may be a here and there thing, but as they start to get older, you will likely start to see it become more of the “norm”. You can consider adjusting their bedtime, so they go to bed later, making them more tired and ready for a nap when it comes time.
With this being said, here are some tips that I did find useful at some point with my three kids on actually helping to get them to nap.
Stick to a Routine
The most success I had between all three of my kids getting them to take naps was to create a daily routine and stick to it. This meant that we got up around the same time every day, ate breakfast at the same time, left the house at the same time (when needed), got home around the same time, had lunch at the same time, and nap time was consistently at the same time….then so on and so forth until bedtime - which was at the same time every day. This was much easier to stick to when I had just my two boys, especially when my oldest was in pre-K an Kindergarten. However, it’s not always realistic and my life with three kids required so much flexibility that a daily routine just wasn’t possible! If you’re able to though, having a daily routine really helps make naptime much easier!
Give them “Active Playtime”
If your schedule allows it, give them an hour or so of “active playtime” before nap time. Let them run, jump, dance - whatever gets their little body moving! Burn off some of that toddler energy we all wish we had today!
Limit Sugar and Screen Time Before Naptime
Be careful of what snacks and lunch they get just before naptime, making sure they don’t get something sugar filled. You can also turn the TV off at least an hour before nap time as part of your “nap time prep routine”, so they can fall asleep more easily
Make Naptime Look More Like Bedtime
I also found a lot of success in getting my toddlers to nap better when I switched out their normal curtains for room darkening curtains. Our naptime routine followed very closely to our bedtime routine (reading a book or two, turning on the night light, closing the curtains, singing a song). They will recognize the “it’s time for sleep” routine, whether it’s day or night, so keeping those similar can really make a difference.